What happens in those times when you mess up, get it wrong, repeat the same old mistakes?
Have you ever felt regretful, unproud of your thoughts or actions? I know I have!
There are times when it can feel like no matter how much I learn and read, progress and develop that I'll repeat some old habit, some old thinking pattern and feel like Im never going to learn.
Thinking and related behaviours become habitual and like with any habit we want to change...it is hard! We become addicted even though you might be unaware of it or not fully conscious of it.
When we do become aware, we can vow to change our ways and adopt new habits and patterns. All goes well and then Bam! We fall off the wagon and we feel like we've lost the fight.
I had an occasion recently where I just felt utterly hopeless at my improvement. It was a day where it felt like I'm always going to resort back to a certain way of thinking and behaving because of my habits, how I grew up, the conditionings that I have taken on....but where would that leave me? If I give in to my shame or guilt, or internal beating myself up, I certainly do not feel good about myself and no one else will benefit either.
So we notice, we observe, we take a step back and even smile- a bump in the road, a little receding in your progress and efforts, it is all ok. How long would you say physically it has taken you to learn a specific new skill? How often would you say you might fall out or stumble in a Yoga pose, or have to start walking on a run, take a break or turn back on a long hike? We don't need to kick ourselves or beat ourselves up for these occurrences, we simply say, thats ok, I'll try again. So it is the same with our mindset, our thinking and our behaviours. We strive to be the best versions of ourselves, the versions we desire and feel true connection to and when we hit set backs and our own human foibles, we begin again.
'On this path, effort never goes to waste, and there is no failure.' Bhagavad Gita
Take a comfortable seat with an upright spine. Sit on a cushion or against a wall if you need. Set your timer for 4 minutes.
Soften your shoulders, your jaw and your breath. Feel your spine lengthen and your sit bones ground down.
Bring your eyes softly closed.
Become aware of your breath, your inhale and your exhale. When you notice your mind wander or you begin to follow thoughts, bring your awareness back to your breath.
Begin to visualise a time where you have felt frustrated at yourself. Notice your feelings and thoughts as a witness without judgement.
Begin to visualise a warm light surrounding you and comforting you and we each breath you feel this warmth.
Bring your awareness then back to your great and repeat to yourself, 'I do the best that I can in any given moment.'
Once you hear your timer sound bring your awareness back to your body, notice your sit bones grounded and your spine lengthened and you can open your eyes.
Following your meditation, journal about your visualisation, thoughts and feelings you observed.
Read back over your writing.
If you were listening to a friend tell you what you have wrote, what would you say to them to comfort them?
How would you reassure and give them support?
Write down your thoughts and read them a loud to yourself.
Create a mantra for yourself for the next time you feel frustrated at yourself, the next time you feel disappointed or hopeless....have this mantra written somewhere you can see and remind yourself of it often and when you need.